Will Rogers, who died in a plane crash with Wylie Post in 1935,

>>>>> was probably the greatest political sage this country has ever known.

>>>>> Enjoy the following:

>>>>>

>>>>> 1. Never slap a man who's chewing tobacco.

>>>>>

>>>>> 2. Never kick a cow chip on a hot day.

>>>>>

>>>>> 3. There are 2 theories to arguing with a woman...neither works.

>>>>>

>>>>> 4. Never miss a good chance to shut up.

>>>>>

>>>>> 5. Always drink upstream from the herd.

>>>>>

>>>>> 6. If you find yourself in a hole, stop digging.

>>>>>

>>>>> 7. The quickest way to double your money is to fold it and put it

>>>>> back in your pocket.

>>>>>

>>>>> 8. There are three kinds of men: The ones that learn by reading.

>>>>> The few who learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee

>>>>> on the electric fence and find out for themselves.

>>>>>

>>>>> 9. Good judgment comes from experience, and a lot of that comes

>>>>> from bad judgment.

>>>>>

>>>>> 10. If you're riding' ahead of the herd, take a look back every

>>>>> now and then to make sure it's still there.

>>>>>

>>>>> 11. Lettin' the cat outta the bag is a whole lot easier'n puttin'

>>>>> it back.

>>>>>

>>>>> 12. After eating an entire bull, a mountain lion felt so good he

>>>>> started roaring. He kept it up until a hunter came along and shot

>>>>> him. The moral:

>>>>> When you're full of bull, keep your mouth shut.

>>>>>

>>>>> ABOUT GROWING OLDER...

>>>>>

>>>>> First ~ Eventually you will reach a point when you stop lying

>>>>> about your age and start bragging about it.

>>>>>

>>>>> Second ~ The older we get, the fewer things seem worth waiting in

>>>>> line for.

>>>>>

>>>>> Third ~ Some people try to turn back their odometers. Not me, I

>>>>> want people to know 'why' I look this way. I've traveled a long

>>>>> way and some of the roads weren't paved.

>>>>>

>>>>> Fourth ~ When you are dissatisfied and would like to go back to

>>>>> youth, think of Algebra.

>>>>>

>>>>> Fifth ~ You know you are getting old when everything either dries

>>>>> up or leaks.

>>>>>

>>>>> Sixth ~ I don't know how I got over the hill without getting to

>>>>> the top.

>>>>>

>>>>> Seventh ~ One of the many things no one tells you about aging is

>>>>> that it is such a nice change from being young.

>>>>>

>>>>> Eighth ~ One must wait until evening to see how splendid the day

>>>>> has been.

>>>>>

>>>>> Ninth ~ Being young is beautiful, but being old is comfortable.

>>>>>

>>>>> Tenth ~ Long ago when men cursed and beat the ground with sticks,

>>>>> it was called witchcraft. Today it's called golf

>>>>>

>>>>> And finally ~ If you don't learn to laugh at trouble, you won't

>>>>> have anything to laugh at when you're old.

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